Looking for the best pub puns and jokes to bring some frothy fun to your next night out or cheeky caption?
If you’re a seasoned pint-sipper or just love a good laugh with friends, these bubbly bar puns and pub-perfect jokes are exactly what you need.
From witty one-liners to hilarious happy hour humor, weโve brewed up a batch thatโs crisp, clever, and totally on tap. ๐๐ท๐ฅ
So grab a stool, pour yourself a laugh, and letโs toast to the punniest pub content on the internet! Cheers! ๐ฅณ๐ป
Classic Pub Puns to Break the Ice ๐ง๐บ
- Iโm on a whiskey diet โ Iโve lost three days already! ๐ฅ
- Donโt go bacon my heart… unless it comes with a pint. ๐ฅ๐บ
- Time flies when you’re having rum! ๐ฐ๏ธ๐น
- Ale be there for you, always. โค๏ธ๐บ
- I like my pubes like I like my jokesโon tap! ๐ป๐
- Hoppy hour is the best hour. ๐ป๐ฐ
- Stout of this world! ๐๐บ
- Larger than life. ๐๐บ
- Brew can do it! ๐ช๐ป
- Sip happens. ๐ท๐คท
- Letโs raise the bar and the glasses! ๐ฅ
- Life Is brewtiful when youโre at the pub. ๐บโจ
- Pent up demand for a good laugh! ๐
- Donโt worry, beer happy. ๐บ๐
- You canโt sip with us. ๐
๐ธ
Punny Pub Captions for Social Media ๐ฑ๐ธ
- โTap into happiness.โ ๐ป
- โPoor decisions were made.โ ๐๐น
- โAle yeah!โ ๐๐บ
- โServing looks and lager.โ ๐๐บ
- โPub life chose me.โ ๐ซถ
- โJust here for the draught picks.โ ๐บ๐ท
- โHappiness is a full pint.โ ๐ป๐
- โDrinkinโ good vibes only.โ โจ๐ท
- โCurrent status: stout-standing.โ ๐ฏ
- โMe and brew forever.โ ๐ซ๐บ
- โBottoms up, buttercup!โ ๐ผ๐ฅ
- โIPA a lot when Iโm drinking.โ ๐
- โPint-sized fun!โ ๐ฅณ
- โDraught into the good life.โ ๐๐บ
- โFrom dusk till draught.โ ๐๐ป
Pub Jokes Thatโll Keep You Buzzing ๐บ๐คฃ
- Why did the beer file a police report?
It got mugged! ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐บ - What did one pint say to the other?
Letโs stick together โ weโre better in pairs! ๐ฏ๐ป - Why did the man bring string to the bar?
He wanted to tie one on! ๐ชข๐ธ - What do you call a ghost at the pub?
Boo-ze! ๐ป๐ป - How do bartenders stay calm?
They keep their spirits up! ๐ธ๐ - Why donโt beers get lost?
They always follow the pub signs! ๐ชง๐บ - What did the pub say to the cocktail?
You’re mixing things up around here! ๐น๐ - What do you get when you cross a pub with a bakery?
Beer rolls! ๐ฅ๐บ - Why did the pint blush?
It saw the ale-naked truth! ๐ณ๐ป - What’s beer’s favorite yoga pose?
Pint-asana. ๐ง๐บ
Cheers-Worthy Wordplay ๐ท๐ฅณ
- Let’s get fizzy-cal! ๐พ๐
- Shaken, stirred, and slightly slurred. ๐ธ๐
- Iโm ale-in for the laughs. ๐ฝ๐บ
- Genuinely having a great time. ๐ธโจ
- Stop and smell the rosรฉ. ๐น๐ท
- Bar none, this place is the best! ๐๐ป
- This beer is larger than life. ๐คฉ๐บ
- Cocktails before details. ๐น๐
- Pub and proud. ๐๐ป
- Stout of control! ๐ต๐บ
- IPA-ologize for how punny I am. ๐๐บ
- Wine does not have another? ๐ท๐
- This ale’s got character… and a little foam. ๐ค๐บ
- I came, I saw, I con-cider-ed. ๐๐บ
- Raise your glass if you’re unstoppable! ๐๐ป
Funny Pub Pickup Lines ๐บ๐
- โAre you a pint? Because I can’t get enough of you.โ ๐
- โYou must be a craft beerโcomplex, strong, and absolutely my type.โ ๐บ
- โYou had me at ale-o.โ ๐
- โAre you the special of the night? Because you just made my evening.โ ๐๐ธ
- โYou must work at a breweryโbecause youโve got good taste.โ ๐๐ป
- โIs your name Guinness? Because you’re smooth and dark.โ ๐๐บ
- โWanna hop on over to my table?โ ๐ธ๐ป
- โYou’re the lime to my tequila shot.โ ๐๐ฅ
- โI didnโt choose the pub life, the pub life chose meโand you!โ ๐
- โYouโre the only tonic my gin needs.โ ๐ธ๐
- โAre you an open tab? Because I canโt stop adding to you.โ ๐ณ๐
- โLetโs make poor decisions together.โ ๐ฅ
- โYouโre ale I need tonight.โ โค๏ธ
- โIs your name Happy Hour? Because you make me smile.โ ๐๐บ
- โAre you a barstool? Because I could sit with you all night.โ ๐
Bar Puns One Liners ๐น๐
- I walked into a barโฆ and said ouch! ๐ค๐บ
- Whiskey business is my kind of hustle. ๐ฅ๐ผ
- I told the bartender I needed a breakโhe gave me a Kit-Kat and a pint. ๐ซ๐ป
- This bar has too many spiritsโฆ Iโm spooked! ๐ป๐ธ
- Iโm not tipsy, just practicing my salsa. ๐๐ท
- Bar stools make great life coachesโalways supportive! ๐ชโค๏ธ
- Cheers to pour decisions! ๐ป๐คท
- My liver just texted me: โUnsubscribe.โ ๐ต๐บ
- I come to the bar for the ambianceโฆ and the tequila. ๐ฎ๐ฅ
- My beer and I are in a committed relationship. ๐บ๐
- Hops and dreams brought me here. ๐บโจ
- Alcohol later! ๐๐ธ
- Can I have another? I need material for my blog. ๐๐น
- I left my heart at the barโฆ right next to my dignity. ๐๐ป
- If lost, return to the nearest pub. ๐งญ๐บ
Short Bar Jokes for Adults ๐ท๐
- Why donโt scientists trust atoms at the bar? They make up everything! ๐งช๐ป
- A gin and tonic walks into a bar. Bartender says, โYou again?โ ๐ธ๐
- What’s a bartenderโs favorite exercise? Barbell curls. ๐ช๐น
- Why did the martini fail the job interview? Too shaken to answer. ๐ฅถ๐ธ
- Two olives walk into a bar. One falls off the counter. The other says, “Olive you!” ๐ซโค๏ธ
- Bartender: โWhy so glum?โ Me: โI poured my feelings into this drink.โ ๐ข๐ท
- My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingoโฆ I had to put my foot down at the bar. ๐ฆฉ๐
- The bartender says, โWe donโt serve time travelers here.โ A time traveler walks in. โณ๐บ
- What did the beer say to the wine? โYouโre so grape!โ ๐๐บ
- Why was the cocktail nervous? It couldnโt handle the pressure. ๐น๐ฌ
- Ever heard of a vampire bartender? They only serve blood-y Marys. ๐ง๐น
- My drinking buddy is imaginary, but he always pays. ๐คทโโ๏ธ๐ธ
- I like my jokes and I like my whiskey: neat. ๐ฅ๐
- Why do bartenders love the alphabet? Because they always serve G&Ts! ๐ค๐ธ
- I tried to start a band called โBar Tab,โ but everyone kept skipping out. ๐ฅ๐ธ
Short Funny Bar Jokes ๐๐ป
- I went to a bar for exerciseโฆ 12-ounce curls count, right? ๐ช๐บ
- The bartender asked, โWhatโs your poison?โ I said, โEx-boyfriendโs texts.โ ๐ฑ๐ฌ
- I spilled beer on my phone. Now it only buzzes. ๐ณ๐บ
- The bar has WiFi but I came for the hops. ๐ป๐ถ
- I told my therapist about the bar. Now she goes too. ๐๏ธ๐ท
- My credit card gets more action at the bar than I do. ๐ณ๐ฅฒ
- Beer: because adulting is hard. ๐บ๐
- I went for one drink. Ten drinks later, I became the karaoke champion. ๐ค๐น
- No oneโs judging you at the barโexcept the bartender. ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ธ
- I walked into a bar and found my doppelgangerโฆ in the mirror. ๐ช๐บ
- This bar has great tasteโlike me. ๐๐ท
- Donโt trust stairs at a bar. Theyโre always up to something. ๐ช๐ธ
- The only shots I take come with lime and salt. ๐ฅ๐
- I told the bartender a joke. He said I was the punchline. ๐คก๐น
- I bring my problems to the bar, and they drown. ๐งฝ๐ธ
Rude Pub Jokes ๐๐บ
โ ๏ธ Slightly cheeky content ahead! Keep it light and playful.
- I told the bartender I wanted something strongโhe handed me my exโs phone number. ๐ฑ๐ณ
- That beer was colder than my love life. ๐ง๐
- I drink to forgetโฆ but the bartender keeps reminding me. ๐๐ท
- Your tab is bigger than your personality. ๐ณ๐
- Youโre not drunk, youโre just normally annoying. ๐๐ธ
- If stupidity was a cocktail, you’d be top-shelf. ๐คท๐น
- Who brought the buzzkill to happy hour? ๐๐บ
- You must be a lagerโflat, cold, and overhyped. ๐ฅฑ๐บ
- You’re the reason happy hour ends early. โฐ๐ป
- Youโre not drunkโyouโre just revealing your true self. ๐ง ๐ธ
- They say the truth comes out after three drinks. Yours was disappointing. ๐ฌ๐ท
- This pub needs fewer opinions and more coasters. ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ป
- You call that dancing? My pint has a better rhythm. ๐๐บ
- This beer has more character than your Tinder profile. ๐๐บ
- Last callโฆ for your terrible sense of humor. ๐ซ๐
Clean Short Bar Jokes ๐งผ๐ธ
- Why did the soda avoid the bar? It didnโt want to be mixed up. ๐ฅค๐
- A beer walks into a bar. The bartender says, โYouโre not even dressed!โ ๐บ๐
- Knock knock. Whoโs there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad weโre at the bar? ๐๐
- Why donโt bananas hang out at the bar? They always split. ๐๐ป
- What did the bartender say to the lemon? โYouโre so sour!โ ๐๐
- I tried to make a cocktail pun, but it got watered down. ๐ง๐ธ
- A napkin walks into a barโฆ it gets folded fast. ๐งป๐บ
- What do you call a sheep at the bar? A baa-rtender. ๐๐ป
- Why did the tomato blush at the bar? It saw the salad dressing. ๐ฅ๐
- Why did the sandwich go to the bar? It needed to loaf around. ๐ฅช๐บ
- What did the ice cube say to the drink? “I’m chillinโ!” ๐ง๐ธ
- Where do tired drinks go? To a rest-a-bar. ๐๐น
- Bartenders always mix things up. ๐งช๐ธ
- This pub serves pun-derful drinks. ๐๐ป
- No alcohol, no problemโฆ just punch! ๐ฅ๐ฅค
Pub Puns Reddit ๐ป๐ฑ
- Found a pun so hoppy it should be illegal. ๐บ๐
- Reddit: where pints and puns unite. ๐ง ๐ป
- “Beer today, gone tomorrow” โ top Reddit wisdom. ๐ซ ๐บ
- My humorโs as dry as this cider. ๐ง๐
- โStout of controlโ โ Reddit, you win again. ๐ฅ๐บ
- AskReddit: Is it still day drinking if you’re at a pub with no windows? ๐ถ๏ธ๐ป
- Someone said, โThis pub is so old, the floorboards remember Shakespeare.โ ๐๐ดโโ ๏ธ
- Redditor: โI donโt spill drinks, I baptize the bar.โ ๐คฃ๐๏ธ
- The only thing more twisted than the taps are the punchlines. ๐๐ป
- This pub thread aged better than my Guinness. ๐บ๐ง
- Reddit pub puns are the hops of the internet. ๐บ๐ฌ
- โAle yeah!โ is now my new go-to phrase. ๐ฅณ๐ป
- Saw a Reddit comment that said, โIPA stands for Iโm Pretty Awesome.โ ๐๐ฅ
- These Reddit pub threads are barrel-aged humor. ๐ข๏ธ๐คฃ
- If laughter is medicine, Redditโs a bottomless pharmacy. ๐๐บ
Top Pub Jokes for Pub Quiz Nights ๐ง ๐ป
- Why donโt skeletons go to the pub? No body to go with. โ ๏ธ๐ท
- Whatโs a pubโs favorite subject? Ale-gebra. โ๐บ
- How do bartenders keep secrets? They bottle it up. ๐ค๐พ
- Whatโs Sherlockโs favorite drink? Lemonadeโno mystery there. ๐ต๏ธ๐
- What do you get when you cross a pub and a gym? Beer bell-ies. ๐๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ป
- Why did the pub file a police report? It got mugged. ๐ฑ๐บ
- What kind of music do pubs play? Baroqueโbecause it’s classy. ๐ถ๐ท
- Why did the customer bring a ladder to the pub quiz? To reach the high spirits! ๐ช๐ฅ
- What drink do ghosts prefer? Boo-ze. ๐ป๐ธ
- Whatโs a pirateโs favorite pub? The one with the best arrrrr-mchairs. ๐ดโโ ๏ธ๐ป
- Why did the beer win an award? Because it was un-bee-lievable. ๐๐บ
- Why was the pub so calm during the quiz? Everyone was on tap. ๐ค๐ป
- What happens when you mix trivia with tequila? Memory loss. ๐
๐ฅ
- Whatโs a vampireโs pub drink of choice? Blood light. ๐ง๐บ
- Did you hear about the psychic who worked at the pub? She knew your order before you did. ๐ฎ๐ธ
Funny Pub Names with Puns ๐ ๐ป
- The Alchemist ๐งโโ๏ธ๐บ
- Lord of the Pints ๐๐ป
- Tequila Mockingbird ๐๐ฅ
- Brewed Awakening โ๐บ
- Pint of No Return ๐๐ป
- The Hoptimist ๐๐บ
- Whiskey Business ๐๐ฅ
- The Tipsy Gnome ๐ง๐ธ
- The Drunken Poet โ๏ธ๐ท
- Ale to the Chief ๐๏ธ๐บ
- The Yeastie Boys ๐ค๐บ
- Pitcher Perfect ๐ถ๐ป
- Pour Decisions ๐๐ท
- The Froth and Furious ๐๐บ
- Tap That ๐ป๐
Witty Pub Sayings for Signs and Menus ๐ชง๐ฝ๏ธ
- โSoup of the day: whiskey.โ ๐ฅ๐
- โSave water, drink beer.โ ๐งโ๐บ
- โWork is the curse of the drinking class.โ ๐
๐ท
- โTake life one sip at a time.โ ๐ฅค๐
- โGood friends and cold beersโwhat else do you need?โ ๐ซ๐ป
- โOur wifi is strong, but our cocktails are stronger.โ ๐ช๐ธ
- โAlcohol: because adulting is hard.โ ๐๐บ
- โIf you’re reading this, you’re already hereโcheers!โ ๐๐ป
- โHappy hour is our favorite math problem.โ โ๐น
- โDrink triple, see double, act single.โ ๐ตโ๐ซ๐ท
- โNo working during drinking hours.โ ๐๐บ
- โLifeโs too short for cheap beer.โ ๐ธ๐ซ๐บ
- โFirst we drink, then we do things.โ โ
๐ธ
- โIn wine thereโs truth. In beer, thereโs strength. In tequila… thereโs regret.โ ๐ฌ๐ฅ
- โMind the gap between refills.โ ๐ณ๏ธ๐ป
Short Pub Puns and Wordplay ๐งฉ๐บ
- Aleโs well that ends well. ๐บโจ
- You stout my heart. โค๏ธ๐บ
- Letโs raise the bar. ๐๐ป
- Beerly beloved, we are gathered hereโฆ ๐ฐ๐บ
- Hops, skip, and a gulp! ๐๐บ
- Youโre the gin to my tonic. ๐ธ๐
- Canโt handle me? Lager it! ๐๐บ
- Iโm so cider-tracked today. ๐ต๐
- Whiskey me away. ๐ช๏ธ๐ฅ
- IPA a lot of IPA when I drink. ๐ญ๐บ
- My points exactly. โ
๐ป
- No crying over spilled beer. ๐
๐บ
- Pour it on me! ๐ง๐ท
- Iโm on a beer roll. ๐๐บ
- Brew can do it! ๐ช๐บ
Punny Pub Quotes ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ป
- โTo beer or not to beer, that is the question.โ ๐ญ๐บ
- โI came. I drank. I forgot what happened.โ ๐ง ๐น
- โLife happens, beer helps.โ ๐คท๐ป
- โBar now or bar never.โ โ๐บ
- โWine not?โ ๐ท๐
- โBeer: because sometimes water just wonโt cut it.โ ๐ฆโ๐บ
- โLiquor might not solve problems, but neither does water.โ ๐คท๐ธ
- โA pub is just a therapist you can drink with.โ ๐๏ธ๐บ
- โLess bitter, more cider.โ ๐๐
- โWhen in doubt, order another round.โ ๐๐ป
- โStay hoppy.โ ๐ฐ๐บ
- โWhere everybody knows your pint.โ ๐งโโ๏ธ๐ป
- โLife is brewtiful.โ ๐๐บ
- โDrink outside the box.โ ๐ฆ๐น
- โOn Wednesdays, we wear beer goggles.โ ๐๐บ
British Pub Jokes ๐ฌ๐ง๐บ
- What do you call a British man in a pub? Regular. ๐บ๐ด๏ธ
- โFancy a pint?โ is basically a love language. โค๏ธ๐ป
- I tried to leave the pubโฆ but the Queen said no. ๐๐ซ
- Whatโs a pub without fish and chips? Blasphemy. ๐๐
- This lagerโs more English than the Queenโs Corgi. ๐ถ๐บ
- In Britain, itโs not gossip until itโs said at the pub. ๐ฃ๏ธ๐บ
- Why do Brits drink warm beer? Lucas fridge jokes never get old! ๐๐บ
- A British pub crawl is just a polite parade. ๐โโ๏ธ๐ป
- I asked for tea at the pub. They gave me Guinness. โโ๐บโ
- “Mind the ale gap!” ๐๐บ
- Youโre only one pint away from speaking fluent Cockney. ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ป
- Cheers, mateโitโs medicinal. ๐จโโ๏ธ๐ท
- Pubs: the real British Parliament. ๐๏ธ๐ป
- Who needs Buckingham when youโve got bottomless pints? ๐๐บ
- Bobโs your bartender! ๐จ๐ป
Bar and Pub Humor ๐๐น
- The bartender said, โWe serve everyoneโฆ even you.โ ๐๐ธ
- Alcohol is a solutionโchemically and emotionally. ๐งชโค๏ธ
- Iโm not drunk, Iโm wine-happy. ๐ท๐
- Bartenders: the real MVPs of emotional support. ๐๐ป
- A cocktail a day keeps the boring away. ๐น๐
- This bar has more personality than my office. ๐ผโ๐บโ
- I told a joke at the barโฆ now I owe a round. ๐ฅฒ๐ป
- My hangover has trust issues. ๐ตโ๐ซ๐ฅ
- Happy hour: where sadness is 50% off. ๐๐ธ
- Don’t ask why Iโm at the bar. Ask why you’re not. ๐คจ๐ป
- โI only had one drink.โ โ Every liar ever. ๐คฅ๐ท
- The only thing shaken here is my self-control. ๐ฌ๐ธ
- Pubs make the world go ’round. Or is that the beer? ๐๐บ
- I bring nothing to the tableโexcept rounds. ๐ป๐โโ๏ธ
- If life gives you lemons, ask for tequila. ๐๐ฅ
Drinking Jokes and Puns Pub Dad Joke ๐๐ด๐ป
- I used to play piano in a pub, but I couldnโt find my keys. ๐น๐
- I told my dad I drink responsiblyโฆ he laughed and poured me a pint. ๐๐บ
- Why donโt pubs serve calendars? Too many dates. ๐๏ธ๐คฃ
- I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on meโฆ at the bar. ๐
๐ท
- What do you call a nervous drinker? A shaken, not stirred dad. ๐ฌ๐ธ
- My dadโs pub joke? โYouโve ale-ways got me!โ ๐จโ๐ง๐บ
- Why did the beer file a complaint? It was too drafty. ๐บ๐
- My dad said, โQuit whining and start winning.โ ๐ท๐ด
- Pub puns? Iโve got a barrel full. ๐ข๏ธ๐
- Why did the chicken go to the pub? To prove it wasn’t a chicken. ๐๐ป
- Dad said, โThat beerโs older than your jokes.โ Touchรฉ. ๐ฐ๏ธ๐บ
- My dad calls hangovers โsips of regret.โ ๐ฅด๐ท
- What did the pint glass say to the full bottle? โGrow up.โ ๐ผโก๏ธ๐บ
- I asked my dad how to drink responsibly. He said, โDonโt spill it.โ ๐คท๐ป
- Cheers to dads, puns, and beer guts. ๐จ๐บ๐
Pub Knock Knock Jokes ๐ช๐บ
- Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Ale.
Ale who?
Ale be back after one more! ๐บ๐ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Beer.
Beer who?
Beer-lieve me, Iโm hilarious. ๐๐ป - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Gin.
Gin who?
Gin-erally speaking, I need a drink. ๐ธ๐ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Cider.
Cider who?
Cider things happen at the pub. ๐๐ป - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Whiskey.
Whiskey who?
Whiskey business this late at night! ๐ต๏ธโโ๏ธ๐ฅ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Lager.
Lager who?
Lager down, youโve had enough! ๐ ๐บ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Tequila.
Tequila who?
Tequila mocking me again? ๐ญ๐ฅ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Brew.
Brew who?
Brew-hoo, why are you cryingโ? Itโs happy hour! ๐ข๐ป - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Bar.
Bar who?
Bar none, this is the best joke yet. ๐ฅ๐ธ - Knock knock.
Whoโs there?
Drink.
Drink who?
Drink up before last call! ๐๐น
Last Call: ๐๐ป
Whether you’re sharing a laugh over lager or crafting a clever caption for your pub night pics, these pub puns and jokes are guaranteed to keep the good times flowing.
From witty wordplay to toast-worthy punchlines, you’ve now got the perfect mix of humor to raise spiritsโliterally and figuratively. ๐ฅโจ
So next time you’re out at your favorite local bar or hosting a cozy get-together, don’t forget to bring the jokes along with the drinks.
And remember: in the great tavern of life, laughter is always on tap. Cheers to that! ๐ป๐